


My Home

by Havokftw



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Birthday Party, Flashbacks, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Gay, M/M, Sappy Ending, Team Bonding
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-22
Updated: 2016-07-22
Packaged: 2018-07-26 03:04:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,540
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7557643
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Havokftw/pseuds/Havokftw
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jihoon is struggling to see through his friendship with Seungcheol after his admission on Project17. He feels too much has changed between them and feels betrayed, distanced from his oldest friend. Seungcheol feels it too and tries to repair their precious bond.</p>
            </blockquote>





	My Home

**Author's Note:**

> Don't know if anybody else was nervous watching that campfire scene in Project17. I was like :0 DUDE, S.Coups why in front of everyone like chill...take him to the side or something. I also didn't feel that they hugged it out enough for my taste...I'm sure some of the show is scripted but still...my heart really went out to Woozi, he looked broken.  
> I'm also patting myself on the back for not adding smut here.....I nearly did. I would add smut to my cereal in the morning instead of milk if I could.

"Happy Birthday tooooo yoooouuu!!!" Soonyoung drew out the last two words as he finished his routine with a spin and a quick bow. He stood up again, a big grin on his face as Jihoon slow clapped him.

"Thanks Hoshi, now, if you dont mind, I'd like to get back to work" he said turning his chair back around to face the producing console.

Soonyoung's hand on the arm of the chair stopped him from turning all the way around.

"What! You can’t work on your birthday! You need to celebrate with us!" he said pulling the chair away from the console so Jihoon couldn’t ignore him. "They’re all waiting for us back at the dorm, we've got presents, balloons...cake!" he raised his eyesbrows as he spoke getting more excited with each word, more pumped about the party than Jihoon was.

"Thats nice, but I really need to finish this so go ahead without me Hoshi" Jihoon said, trying in vain to roll his chair back to his work station. It wasn’t budging and glanced down to see Hoshi standing on the chair leg stubbornly, he turned his head back up to see the his expression had stiffened and "Super-Serious-Hoshi" had taken over.

"Its your birthday Jihoon, we can't start the party without the birthday boy now can we? So stop being so selfish and come and have fun on your birthday" Soonyoung said.

"How am I being selfish if I don’t want to celebrate MY own birthday" he argued, but it was clearly falling on deaf ears as Hoshi grabbed hold of his hand and started wheeling him, still seated on his chair to the exit.

"You're being selfish because you don't want to spend time with your hyungs and dongsaengs, who want to spend time with you" Hoshi explained finally reaching the door. "If I have to drag you all the way back to the dorm in this chair I will" He threatened, Jihoon wouldn’t put it past him either.

"Ugh, fine" Jihoon yelled, fed up.  
"Yay!, I knew I could pull it off, and Seungcheol said I would need his help to drag you outta here" he said cheerily

Jihoon bristled at the mention of the other boys name. He would definitely not have left had Seungcheol been the one to ask him. 

It wasn't personal, oh wait, yes it was, Seungcheol had made it pretty personal when he spoke out about the elephant in the room a few months ago. 

Jihoon had been shocked, hurt actually, when his oldest friend invited the rest of the group - and a whole bunch of cameras, into the more personal aspects of their friendship. Sharing something that bothered you with somebody else was fine, but that night by the campfire was the wrong time and the wrong place to discuss Jihoon's rapidly worsening "temper" and "mood". He was speechless, defenceless even, as the older boy shared his feeling publicly.

_"I am most upset with Woozi”_  
_“If someones thoughts don’t match up with his, he becomes aggressive”  
_ _“I’ve found myself being careful about what I say around you”_

_So this is your solution? To tell everyone else about it- Idiot!_

They did have a sit down a “face to face” with each other after, the cameras still rolling off course. They ‘talked’ about their issues and attempted to sort it all out.  
They even hugged it out in the end and for all Seungcheol knew, it was water under the bridge, they had cleared the air or so to speak. 

_Yeah, the air is pretty clear now, so clear its devoid of Oxygen and I can’t breathe, it’s choking me just being around him._

_“Woozi and I have been together the longest, I thought we were on the same wavelength and so I though he would know what I am thinking about, without me even saying it” Seungcheol had said-to everyone._

_Tell me Hyung-Can you tell how I am feeling now Seungcheol? I'm dying right in front of you can't you see._

Jihoon couldn't shake the deep sense of betrayal he felt that night. How could he say those thing and not realise how much it destroyed Jihoon to hear them. 

_The ones you love the most can damage you the most_

Now the thought of spending the entire day at the dorm achingly close to him, was almost terrifying, He was always able to use the excuse of work to get some downtime alone in the studio, he would excuse himself after dance practice and enjoy the solitude of producing to avoid the small awkward conversations Seungcheol had been trying to have with him.

He knew Seungcheol wasn't stupid either, he knew things didn't go back to the way they were after that night, he knew because he had asked Jihoon a handful of times "Can we talk?"  
Jihoon was half tempted to reply "But wouldn't you prefer for the cameras to be around when we talk Hyung". He was never courageous enough for that response however, he usually replied with a "Sure" and then made some lame excuse to not be there for the opportunity.

He couldn't keep it up forever, but he could try.

……………

“SURPRISE!” A loud chorus of screams echoed through the dorm as Jihoon and Hoshi walked in.

"It's not a surprise you dolts, he knew we were planning this! He was even here at breakfast when we were putting the 'Birthday Boy' banner up!" Joshua said to the small group of younger boys congregating excitedly around the duo.

The deflated chorus descended into "Oh yeah" and a few "Sorry's" at the realisation before breaking out in a loud "HAPPY BIRTHDAY WOOZI" in unison.

"Yeah, great idea guys, that's just what our vocal lead and producer needs, to be hard of hearing" Seungcheol announced, wincing at the sound assaulting the room.

"I'm here, VERY unwillingly so this better be worth my time" Jihoon said flopping onto the corner sofa.

"Oh nononono" Seungkwan tutted, stepping up to Jihoon and pulling him back up again "You don't have time to sit down Woozi, we have too much planned, c'mon" he dragged he smaller boy into the centre of the room.

"We've got all kinds of party food, and music, games and presents!" Dino says excitedly walking next to a hassled Jihoon.

"You're going to be having so much fun you'll wish you were dead" Wonwoo chirped in morbidly. As Jihoon is dragged into the circle of friends, panic starting to rise at the exceedingly happy atmosphere. 

"I wish I was never born" he manages to say before a blindfold is forced over his eyes.

"As Seventeen's MC, naturally I was picked to MC your party Jihoon, and may I say, it brings me great pleasure to announce that the first game we are going to play is...Guess WHO!

"I’ve never heard of it" Jihoon answered quickly, adjusting the blindfold over his eyes- he really hadn't. 

"That's because I made it up about one hour ago” DK announced proudly.

"DK, would you like to explain the rules of the game please" Seungkwan motioned

"Certainly, so here's what you have to do. You have to search around the room for us, blindfolded and when you catch one of us, you have one minute to figure out who it is. If you guess correctly, then you pass the blindfold to that person and it’s their turn next"

"And if I guess wrong?" Jihoon asks, turning his head to were he can hear DK's voice.

"You put the blindfold back on and try again"

"Ok let's start, no peaking 3,2,1- GO!" Jihoon can hear them scrambling around to find cover, his hands searching in front of him cautiously as he makes his way around, trying his best not to fall over. He is immediately alerted to a noise on his left and grasps at the figure trying to evade his touch.

He has them by the arm, he thinks and so he taps his hand up the arm and when he reaches the head he grips onto the short hair there which earns him a low "Ouch" he feels across their face carefully.

"Time's Up, Seungkwan announces. "Guess who!"

"Oh…I dunno… Is it Dino? " He asks tentatively. Then pulls of the blindfold to find The8 standing in front of him.

"WRONG, Blindfold on again Woozi" Seungkwan announced.

"Ughhh, fine" 

"Ok, 3,2,1-GO" Another mad dash and Jihoon stills, listening to the retreating footsteps of his team. 

He moves around again, grasping at what he thinks is the couch, then the coffee table, a sudden jerk of the latter indicates that somebody must be hiding underneath it. He reaches down and grabs onto a leg? An arm? He pats his hand up and reaches the face, he's sure he just poked somebody in the eye but they remain deathly silent. He feels across the face, a long nose, and high cheek bones.

"Times Up" Guess who!" Seungkwan announces again

"Uhmm...DK?" Jihoon answers unsure but pull his blindfold to see Jun cramped under the table, eye twitching looking particularly uncomfortable.

"Wrong, Blindfold again Jihoon" Seungkwan commands.

"This game is impossible!" Jihoon says pulling the blindfold over his eyes reluctantly.

It is hard as he fails to guess correctly for the next three rounds even when he manages to catch Jun for a second time and pokes him in the eye again.

"It's like you don’t even know us man" DK laughs from whatever corner he is hiding safely in. He's almost given up on himself and is feeling around the wall madly when he knocks into someone's shoulder. Gripping on their shoulder, he manoeuvres his hand over their neck to their face and deftly feels around their facial features, features that are so familiar he can see them through his eyelids. 

He cups the face with both hands gently then feels down the angular strong jaw, up towards the small blunt nose, and down again to the lips-plush. The mouth parts to let out a shaky breath between Jihoon's fingers. Jihoon visibly tenses as he realises who he is touching.

"Get a room!" he hears from behind him somewhere, followed by barely concealed laughter.

"Time's Up, Guess who" Seungkwan announces again

He does, without hesitancy "Seungcheol"

A loud cheer erupts and he pulls his blindfold off to see Seungcheol looking down at him, smiling softly as the others clap loudly behind him.

"No surprises that you got S.Coups-Hyung correct" Seungkwan says.

"This game is boring. Can we eat cake now?" Jeonghan asks lazily from the kitchen area. There were murmurs of agreement from the others who had been eyeing the vast display of food on the kitchen table as the game progressed.

"Not, yet, we still have a few more games to play" Seungkwan hisses back

"And I have to wait for the cake to cool down before I decorate it!" Mingyu adds.

They play a few more rounds of Guess Who, the most competitive game of giant twister Jihoon has ever participated in and an exceedingly dangerous game that is a cross between Zombie and Smashing a Pinata, that Vernon suggested, before they gather around the sofa, injured and exhausted to make Jihoon open his presents.

"I already gave Jihoon his present" Soonyoung claims proudly.

"What was it? Jeonghan asks

"I danced for him in the studio earlier, it was a very special performance, right Jihoon?"

"Yes, you are special Hoshi" Jihoon joked.

Jihoon is handed his first present, from Wonwoo and unwraps it as the other watch. A small leather bound notebook is revealed with his name inscribed on the side. "It's a journal, I noticed that the one you currently have is nearly full and I know you like to write down your lyrics in it, I thought it would be useful" It was a thoughtful and sweet gift from Wonwoo, Jihoon smiled. "Thank you Wonwoo, its just what I needed!"

"I got you something you could add to your collection" Dino says, handing Jihoon a small parcel, he unwraps to find a collectible toy. "I know you collect them in your studio, thought you could add it to your display" he offered.

"Aww, thank you Dino, I love these" Jihoon says appreciating the gesture from their Maknae.

"Here, open ours" Vernon and Seungkwan hand him a small crate carefully "We thought it would keep you company when you are working in the studio late at night" Vernon says, pulling the lid of the crate to reveal a glass bowl with a single floating goldfish inside. 

"Ahh that’s perfect actually, I always wanted a low maintenance pet!" Jihoon says

"Fish freak me out, they just sit there and STARE at you" Mingyu confesses to the group

"Hey, don't diss our gift, what did you get him Mingyu dude?"

"I baked him the cake!" Mingyu defends

"And I Helped!" DK chimes in

"No, You didn't, you just licked the batter off the spoon, and the bowl...and my hand!"

"Well, I got him the best present of all" Jeonghan interrupted handing Jihoon a colourfully wrapped parcel "This Jihoonie is for when you’re in the studio, trying to find inspiration for another beautiful song, all you need do is look at this present" Jeonghan says in all seriousness.  
Jihoon unwraps the gift to reveal a framed picture of- Jeonghan himself, as the rest of the room groans in disbelief into their hands.

"Isn't it the most beautiful gift, hang it in your studio and be inspired!" Jeonghan says unashamedly, ignoring the others.

"Seungcheol's next, c'mon what did you get your precious donsaeng Woozi?" Seungkwan asks

Seungchoel lifts a box from his lap and hands it to Jihoon, "I hope you like it" he says timidly. The box is beautifully wrapped in red ribbon, that he carefully unties, repeatedly glancing back at Seungcheol who seems nervous and on edge. Lifting the lid he eyes a small envelope inside and lifts it to reveal his gift. He freezes-his mind flashes back to a moment they shared years earlier.

**********  
_"Oh, Seungcheol, look.....look here" Jihoon points excitedly at the glass cabinet of the video game store they were in. They would visit often after practice to check out the latest arcade games._

_"What is it?" Seungcheol says coming to stand next to his overly excited friend_

_"Eliminate Down, for the Sega Mega drive!" he says staring in awe through the glass_

_"Sega drive, ....hmm vintage" Seungcheol says crouching down next to the smaller boy_

_" I know, it’s kinda dated but ....It brings back memories of home. When I was younger, my cousins used to play it all the time when I visited them, they never let me play though" Jihoon says despondent_

_"Do you know how rare that game is now? I've always wanted to play it and...holy shit look at the price!" he chokes as he eyes the price tag._

_"Oh wow yeah, it really must be rare..., tell you what, when we debut and make it big, I'll buy it for you" Seungcheol said a comforting hand on Jihoon’s shoulder._

 

_He remembered_

.....

They hadn't made it big, yet, but here it was sitting boxed in his lap. Jihoon wasn't sure how long he had been staring down at it for, mesmerized, but a hand waved in front of his face and brought him back to the present moment. 

"Yoohoo, Jihoonie....you ok buddy?" Joshua says next to him.

"Uhhh, yeah...uhh...Thanks Seungcheol -Hyung...you shouldn't have" He stumbles over his words as his face reddens.

He briefly makes eye contact with the older boy, seeing the pain and pleading in his friends eyes, searching for the frayed cord of their friendship with his gaze- before a loud siren erupted though the dorm, echoing through the corridors and alarming the entire group. 

"What the hell is that " Dino shouted over the piercing noise.

"Owwww" Jeonghan moaned covering his ears 

"Its the fire alarm!" Jun shouted at them

"Oh shit..the popcorn!" DK yelled, bolting from the floor towards the kitchen with the others in tow.

"Protect the cake!!" Mingyu yelled as he ran towards the kitchen behind them.

The noise was deafening, and Jihoon watched as Joshua and Wonwoo proceeded to open every window in sight as a small cloud of smoke creeped out of the kitchen doorway into the living space. When Jihoon stood from his seat, a card slipped from his lap, the card that came with Seungcheol's gift. He leaned down to pick it up and as he opened it a picture fell out. 

It was a picture of the two of them when they were young, before the debuted- Seungcheol's arm around his shoulder, both of them smiling. He remembers the day it was taken, early in their training when their parents had visited them and Jihoon had been particularly upset that day, not wishing to say goodbye to his mum again. Seungcheol had been there, had comforted him then, hugging him and reassuring him.  
The flood of memories was intense. He turned the picture over to read the inscription on the back.

_When we are so far away from our families, you are my home._

Jihoon swallowed the lump forming in his throat, could feel the tears stinging his eyes as he repeated the writing in his head and absorbed the message over again.

In the chaos of the smoke and noise, he quickly retreated to his room, heart pounding in his chest. Once he was safely inside he couldn't hold back the flood of tears that erupted. He fell onto his bed, shielding his face with the pillow and sobbed heavily. He ached inside, deep. Feelings of guilt, shame coupled with intense fear and loneliness. 

Tears poured down his cheeks and sank into the pillow below. He was only faintly aware of his bedroom door creaking open, a weight settling next to him on the bed, and fingers softly threading through his hair as he cried. He thought he was imagining the gesture and the comfort it brought him. But he felt painfully alone.

As suddenly as it had started, the siren stopped. 

The silence that followed was louder to his grief-numbed mind. He could hear himself weeping softly now and registered more finely, the hand carding through his hair gently and the soft voice next to his bed shushing him.

He stilled on the bed as the fingers moved down, kneading small circles on his back. He lifted his head up, then turned to see Seungcheol sat next to him, a warm smile on his face.

"What's the matter Jihoonie, why are you crying?" He said, hand moving over Jihoon's cheek, thumb brushing over the tears to wipe them.

"Cheol....cheol...your present..I...." another sob erupted from him shaking his small frame

"Shhhh, it's ok Jihoonie, please don't cry" Seungcheol said, pulling him closer.

"I ....your present was so beautiful...I'm sorry...I was..so angry with you, I'm so..sorry" he said in between small sobs his body shivering.

"No Jihoonie, it's my fault...I just wanted you to open up to me." Seungcheol admitted, carefully pulling the smaller boy onto his lap "We were so close and I thought…You were shutting me out and I wanted to ...help" He continued. "I should have spoken to you alone...I just...I was stupid" he said as he smoothed his hand down Jihoon's back.

"No Hyung...no.....you are not stupid….you are my home" Jihoon said softly, burrowing his face into the crook of Seungcheol's shoulder. He felt Seungcheol nuzzle him and press a small kiss to the side of his cheek. He closed his eyes, the gesture breaking though what remained of his defences. He raised his head to look up at the older boy, eyes unguarded they shared a deep, honest look before Seungcheol dipped his head to press another kiss on Jihoon's lips. They held it for a moment, basking, before pulling back to look at each other again.

Their moment was rudely interuppted when the bedroom door swung open and Mingyu barged in.

"Ok….I don't know what you guys are doing but Jihoon....you need to come and see this cake. I've slaved over it all day and those animals...."he said pointing out the door "are going to destroy it, please come and look at it before its gone!" Mingyu said exasperatedly.

"Ok....chill Mingyu, we are coming" Seungcheol said as Jihoon extracted himself from his lap and they stood together.

When they made it to the kitchen, everyone was standing around the lit cake in anticipation.

"Ok, so the frosting might taste like smoke....but remember that is DK's fault, but it should still be delicious" Mingyu explained to everyone crowding the table.

"Come on Woozi! Blow out your candles!" A few of them shouted.

"Oh...and don’t forget to make a wish!" the rest piped in.

Jihoon stood at the foot of the table and leaned over the cake, his eyes briefly glanced up to search for Seungcheol’s. Their gazes locked.

"Do you know what you are going to wish for?" Seungkwan asked

"Yes" said Jihoon

_Home_


End file.
